---------------------------------------- Note 18 =uddata= *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 7/6/79 6:52 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 6/20/79 4:32 pm graper/udps/unidel Dear Comrades: Attention! Seeing how =uddata= is filling up, I will be reintializing it at 11:17:00 (or 11:17:00, military time) on Friday, June 22. If you have anything in there you need, get it out. At ease. Your Comrade, David Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 1 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 7/6/79 6:52 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 6/22/79 11:25 am graper/udps/unidel Dear Comrades: Seven minutes ago, =uddata= was reinitialized. That is all. Your Friend, David Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 2 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 7/6/79 6:53 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes / unidel 7/2/79 4:16 pm graper / udps / unidel Dear Friends: =uddata= is filling up again. I will be reinitializing it at 3:26, July 3, 1979. Your Friend, David Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 3 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 7/6/79 6:54 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes / unidel 7/2/79 5:19 pm graper / udps / unidel Dear Friends: Special Thanks to Bill Lynch for pointing out my boo-boo: It's going to be reinitialized at 3:26 P.M. (or 15:26, military time). Please do not___ expect uddata to be reintialized at 3:26 A.M. Your Friend, Dave Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 4 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 7/6/79 6:54 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes / unidel 7/3/79 5:23 pm graper / udps / unidel Dear Friends: "=uddata= is reinitialized," he said. The words echoed emptily in the abandoned music building room. He looked down at his lunchbox. In it were five hundred scraps of paper, all saying "Remember to reintialize =uddata=!" He wrote himself a lot of reminders. He checked his watch. Written all over his arm and hand in ball-point ink was "Remember =uddata=!" It was 3:26. P.M. Now it was time for =uddata= to fill again. THE END Your Friend, David Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 5 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 7/18/79 5:27 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 7/17/79 10:03 am graper/udps/unidel Dear Friends: Whoa Nellie, I just took a few winks here at the switch and =uddata= is practically full! It's come rumblin' down the track full'a data, and if any of it's yours, get it out by 9:38 a.m. tommorrow cause I'm reinitializing it then and =uddata= pulls out again, ready for another load. And at 9:39 tommorrow, when you're wiping the sleep from your eyes and you hear that lonesome whistle, don't come whining down here to the digital depot because, hell, the schedules right there on the wall, can't you read it? hell, gave you enough warning. Your Friend, Dave Graper Stationmaster ---------------------------------------- Response 6 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 7/18/79 5:28 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 7/17/79 10:07 am graper/udps/unidel VERSION 2 (For those of you who dislike extended metaphors): Dear Friends: =uddata= is about full. I will be reinitializing it at 9:38:00 tommorrow morning. Please remove any of the contents that you want before that time. Your Friend, David Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 7 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 8/1/79 5:16 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 7/30/79 12:53 pm graper/udps/unidel Notice to Staff: =uddata= is filling up again. It will be reinitialized tomorrow (July 30) at 1:00 in the afternoon. graper/udps ---------------------------------------- Response 8 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 8/1/79 5:17 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 7/31/79 1:05 pm graper/udps/unidel Dear Friends: =uddata= has been reinitialized. Your Comrade David Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 9 of 13 8/1/79 5:17 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 7/31/79 1:29 pm joe maia/udplato/unidel What? One day late? Today is the 31__st!!! Gadzooks! ---------------------------------------- Response 10 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 8/1/79 5:18 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 8/1/79 12:09 pm graper/udps/unidel Dear Mr. Maia: Apologies are in order. The date mentioned in the first note was one day off, therefore throwing off the references thus made afterwards thereupon, causing confusion (as mentioned in previous and aforementioned response number two) and causing concern that I might have indeed reintialized =uddata= before I actually reintialized it, resulting in the falsity of at least one of the notes dependent upon the fact that there were not two differing numbers for the day upon which I wrote the first note and naturally upon the premise that there are not two datasets named =uddata= which is essentially impossible for some reason that Jim Trueblood could probably explain but I just take for granted. Your Friend, Dave Graper ---------------------------------------- Response 11 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 8/21/79 5:25 pm lynch / udplato / unidel staffnotes/unidel 8/10/79 5:34 pm graper/udps/unidel Dear Friends: [Sound of gooey piano/orchestral music] . . .Nature always provides the best way of doing things. Natural goodness comes only from the earth itself, and the most enjoyable life is the most natural way of being. . . [Picture of people programming on terminals in the woods] But sometimes, irregularity sets in. =uddata= gets filled up, and nature needs a little help. [Programmers look at each other with concerned expressions] That's why =uddata= is going to be reinitialized Monday, August 13 at 7 p.m. If there's anything in there you need, please get it out before then. Reinitializing. It's only natural. Your Friend, graper/udps ---------------------------------------- Response 12 of 13 9/13/79 3:39 pm tripp / udps / unidel staffnotes/unidel 9/12/79 1:48 pm graper/udps/unidel Dear Friends: =uddata= will be reinitialized tomorrow at 12 noon. Your Friend, Dave Gra"per staffnotes/unidel 9/12/79 2:14 pm jessica/pso/unidel Just like that? staffnotes/unidel 9/12/79 7:29 pm m frank/udps/unidel Come on let's have one of your nice long, knock down, drag it out, notices that =uddata= will be re-inited! PLEEASE?....... ---------------------------------------- Response 13 of 13 *** A Story by Dr. Graper *** 9/13/79 3:41 pm tripp / udps / unidel staffnotes/unidel 9/12/79 10:00 pm graper/udps/unidel [40,000 feet above Stuttgart, Germany] [Flak bursting all around, plane rocks violently] [Scene from inside cockpit] Navigator: Captain Gra"per! We've got to dump it now and get out of here!! Captain: (Face illuminated by near miss) No way, buddy! We drop our load when I give the word!! [Big explosion] Captain: Damn! There goes engine three! Navigator: We're only on two engines!! We've got to dump it now!! Captain: I give the orders around here, mister!! We wait 'til the dataset is nearly filled, then drop it! [Light on instrument panel lights up] Captain: Alright! 54 out of 55 blocks filled! Reinitialize! [Bomb bays open and tons of data fall to earth] Captain: (Screaming triumphantly) Eat data, Adolf!! [Plane lurches upward with weight gone, increases speed] Navigator: (Sweating) Sorry sir, I guess I was. . .scared Captain: (Grinning) Only a fool wouldn't have been, son.